Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 5 years? You’ve got to be joking, I can barely see 5 metres… My journey into counselling
Hi, I am Andy. I am a registered counsellor based in Peterborough, UK and have decided to branch out into blog writing. This is my first blog, so I wanted to give you a bit of background about me and what kind of things I am planning on writing about. I am often asked about my journey to becoming a counsellor, and I will answer two of the common questions below.
Why did I become a counsellor?
I suffered with anxiety and depression throughout my teens and started therapy around the age of 18 to try and help me cope with it. I remember sitting in the counselling room and the counsellor’s whole demeanour just made me feel at ease with the situation and she wasn’t as ‘stuck up’ as I had anticipated that she would be. I sat there thinking she had such an awesome job and her people skills really resonated with me. I had never been particularly academic at school, but I was always praised for having good people skills and being able to communicate well with my peers and staff. I sat thinking that this was the kind of job I would like to do, but there was no way I would be able to as I wouldn’t be able to get the degree I needed to get there. I had no confidence in my own skills and what my future would bring, and although I thought about it a lot, I didn’t ever expect it be achievable.
Years later, I ended up in therapy again, although this time under different circumstances. I was still struggling with anxiety and depression, but I had also recently been registered sight impaired after developing bilateral optic atrophy following a short illness. This greatly reduced my vision, left me colour deficient (so I struggle to see colours) and completely obliterated my confidence and self-esteem. I was 31 years of age and could see absolutely no future (pardon the pun). I would just like to point out that I am not completely blind – I am partially sighted and do have some vision. As I wasn’t born with a visual impairment, most people don’t even realise I am visually impaired as I look ‘normal’ as others tell me. I only disclose my disability if it’s relevant, and many of my clients have never even identified that I have a sight impairment.
In 2013, I managed to secure a support worker role with the local council after being supported back into work by a local disability work group. Although this boosted my confidence, and gave me an element of purpose in life, my eyesight did impact parts of the role that I could do. I had to surrender my driving licence, so was dependent on public transport to get to and from work. I was unable to use a standard computer because of the electronic light and strain it put on my optic nerve. The positive thing about undertaking this role, was it re-lit my fire in wanting to work with people. It also gave me an alternative perspective as many of the people I was supporting had their own mental health or physical challenges themselves, as well as associated learning difficulties.
This made me reflect on my own situation, in that, yes, I do have an impairment. However, I still have the cognitive ability to learn and that I want to learn to make positive steps in my life and create a sustainable and realistic future for myself.
I was still in therapy during this period, and my counsellor said to me “what future do you see for yourself and where do you want to be?”. I sat there with a smirk on my face, and said “in your chair, doing your job!”. It was at this point, he challenged me and asked why was I not doing it? This kind of stumped me a little bit, and I had to have a think about it. I responded that I don’t have a degree, and he said, neither do I.
The seed was then planted…….
How did you become a counsellor?
After my last counselling session, I went away and researched how to become a counsellor. It just so happened that weekend, they were having a first steps into counselling session at a local college as a taster session. So, I went along.
I then signed up for a 12-week introductory course to counselling, which was run in the evenings and fit in nicely with my work. I went there with the expectation that I was going to be the oldest in the class, but I turned out to be one of the youngest. Although it was difficult to get back into education at that age, the learning gave me a real sense of purpose and achievement as it was I something I actually had an interest in. It also introduced me to a group of like-minded individuals who became friends, which had a great impact on my own mental health. At first, I was scared to talk about my disability as I didn’t want to be given any special treatment or be a burden on others. I did have to discuss with the tutor that I would need to use special equipment in class and to sit at the front each week so I could see the smartboard. This wasn’t an issue, and it became the norm.
I enjoyed the experience so much, that I went on to achieve my level 2 and 3 qualifications with the same establishment. My confidence and self-esteem had grown so much over this period. A lot of the counselling homework was related to self-reflection and how it links to the various counselling theories, so I learnt a great deal about myself and why I act the way that I do. During skills practice, I soon learnt that many of the others on my class also had their own struggles with mental health. Someone even used to term ‘the wounded healer’ to describe how some of the best counsellors are those that have had their own demons and struggles. At the end of my level 3, I was brimming with confidence and knew this was the profession I needed to pursue.
Having a level 3 qualification, does not give you the right to practice, so I found a degree course that would allow me to do my foundation, and undergraduate degree and be able to practice at the end of it. Given that counselling is supposed to be a kind profession, where judgement is not given, I turned up at the open day and introduced myself. I disclosed my disability within the group, as we were all potential trainee counsellors looking to sign up. The course leader (and the only qualified counsellor in the room), said to me in front of the class and I will never ever forget this ‘oh, that may cause us some issues’. How my jaw didn’t hit the floor, I do not know. I was left feeling completely deflated and sick to the stomach on how someone in such a profession could say something so hurtful. What made it worse, was that this course was underwritten by a university who had a whole department dedicated to supporting those with disabilities. I remember saying to my partner in the car on the way home, what the f$%! would she have said if I had turned up with a guide dog in tow (which I am entitled to do)! Needless to say, I didn’t join the course, despite being offered an interview. This was almost put an end to my counselling journey.
Fortunately, I was able to find another course which would provide me with my level 5 qualification (equivalent to a foundation degree), which would enable me to qualify and practice at the end of it. I was the only bloke on this course, but this was nothing new as there have only been one or two on the other courses I have done. This was a really good course, and it gave me the skills and confidence to work face to face with clients. This 2-year period in my life was full on. As well as managing the course, I had to obtain 100 hours of face-to-face client work, complete my personal therapy, monthly supervision as well as hold down a full-time job. My weekends were taken up with either attending my course or completing the homework. Just when things couldn’t get any worse, COVID hit and the world shut down! I had to retrain to be able to work online and via telephone so I could achieve my client hours. Thankfully, I had already managed to achieve a lot of face-to-face hours, so my confidence was already progressing in this area. Although COVID put a spanner in the works regarding some elements of the course, it allowed me to work nationally with a bereavement agency to support those that had lost their loved ones due to COVID. This was an extremely rewarding experience and gave me a real insight into grief and loss.
Towards the end of my level 5, I was working in a really toxic environment and my mental health was taking a battering. I knew that if I stayed in my current role until I finished my level 5, that other opportunities would open up for me. Things came to a head in June 2021, and I decided to knock the job on the head (as did a few others at the same time). This worked out well for me, as I had just finished my level 5 and a flyer came through the door advertising a degree in Therapeutic Counselling & Psychotherapy and the UCAS deadline had been extended! This was a one-year top up course which would give me a BA (Hons) at the end. I remember thinking this was a sign from above, because things were gradually falling into place. I applied for the course, passed the interview with flying colours and graduated in September 2022 with a first class degree! Something in a million years I never thought I could achieve. I remember standing there in my gown and mortarboard, feeling so proud of myself. I thought about the first degree course I had applied for, and how I was told my disability could cause them some issues. I am so glad I didn’t let that comment stop my journey. If anything, it fuelled me to succeed and I did!
After a couple of years working online and via telephone, I have taken the jump to open my own private practice, and now offer face to face counselling from my office in central Peterborough. I have been given some great opportunities with local businesses, and I continue to grow my client base within the local area.
For future blog posts, I will talk about my ongoing journey and how I have had to adapt my ways of working to allow me to practice. I will also talk about topics that others might find interesting in terms of counselling skills, or questions I get asked. If you have anything that you want to ask me about, feel free to reach out and I will write a blog!
Although it’s been a long and difficult journey, the one thing I haven’t lost is my sense of humour. This is something I am renowned for, and it keeps my going. Let’s hope my sight doesn’t get as a bad as my jokes 😊
Please have a look at my website for more details and have a look at my social media pages.
Website: https://www.thecounsellinghut.co.uk
Bio site (for all social media handles): https://bio.site/thecounsellinghut